No Grand Plan for 2023 — Just Rising Above it ALL by way of Vulnerability
/I’m going to be honest with you. I’m not going into 2023 with some grand plan. Five days in, and I haven’t chosen my “one word,” nor do I feel confident right now with any of my words. As a writer and a wordy girl, it’s an uncomfortable place to be, but it’s where God has me now.
Wrestling. Wondering why. Why is life so hard? Why is pain so deep?
So, here’s to a little vulnerability in 2023.
I’m struggling.
Struggling to focus.
Struggling to fix my eyes on Jesus.
Struggling to find the right words.
Struggling to find any words.
Not just for this post,
but in response to people’s pain,
in response to lots of change,
and in response to a myriad of things.
2023 is a BIG year for our family. It’s a year I’ve been excited about — joyful and expectant in regards to ALL it holds, but now I’m ALL tied up in the tension of the expectation of it ALL coupled with the guilt of even having the expectation in the midst of ALL the pain and suffering and loss for so many so close to me.
This year, we celebrate our 25th wedding anniversary, and we’ll celebrate two graduations — one from college, one from high school. The high school grad will be moving 200 miles away to attend college in the fall in another state, so we’ll have three in college at some point this year in three different states. The youngest turns 16 which means ALL will be on the road, and the oldest, who has already been “on his own” for quite some time, will be officially a full time mechanical engineer.
It’s ALL a bit much for the momma heart, and yet, I’m holding the excitement and expectation of it ALL with some sadness, grief, and pain knowing what some so dear to me are experiencing.
My dear friend, a little over a year ago, celebrated her 25th anniversary, and months later lost her husband.
My cousin, a month ago, celebrated his 25th anniversary, and just yesterday lost his wife.
A mother. A father. Widowed. With kids the same ages and life stages as mine. Going in to 2023 with grief and pain I cannot fully fathom.
My 92 year old grandmother was just diagnosed with breast cancer. She’s having surgery today and starting treatment in the days ahead.
My mom just lost her brother. My cousins’, their dad. My aunt, her husband.
Why, Lord?
Why so much pain and suffering?
Why is the grief so deep?
I ugly cried this morning. But it was good. I was in my car, alone, but not really. God was there — reminding me of His presence in the midst of pain. It was foggy. It’s been foggy, dark, and dreary the past few days.
As I came out of a valley and crested the top of a hill, God gave me a beautiful physical visual of a spiritual truth. Light in the darkness. The sun was shining above the fog that still lingered.
As I reached my destination, I grabbed my Bible and turned to Psalm 42. I’m familiar with this song — the cry of David’s heart while in the depths of despair, and yet, this morning, for me, five days into 2023, God’s truth leapt off the page and into my heart.
If David, a man after God’s own heart, had to encourage himself in the Lord, I do, too. And so do you. Grief and pain are real and they run deep, but God’s truth is just as real and deeper still, and the light of His presence not only penetrates the darkness that pain and grief bring, it will ALWAYS prevail and rise above it ALL, showing us the way to not just wade through the pain, but rise above it to the JOY and HOPE He brings.
ONLY God has the power and authority to:
speak LIFE over DEATH
shine a LIGHT in the DARKNESS
produce PURPOSE out of PAIN
and grow GRATITUDE from great GRIEF
David repeatedly reminded himself of the HOPE that’s found in praising God. The power of praise on the hardest of days. In fact, verse 5 and verse 11 of Psalm 42 are identical. Verbatim. Why? Because we need reminded. We need to encourage ourselves in the Lord as David did.
“Why am I discouraged? Why is my heart so sad? I will put my hope in God! I will praise him again — my Savior and my God.” (Psalms 42:5 and 11, NLT)
“As Christians, our goal in life is not to stay alive, but to stay on course.“ ~ John Piper
So, you may not have some grand plan going into 2023, but may I encourage you to become more acquainted with vulnerability. Sit with grief, but do it with God. Open His Word. Know you’re not alone. Encourage yourself with TRUTH and HOPE. Don’t let the enemy convince you that what you physically see in this life and this world is all there is. Oh friend, there’s so much more. Eternity awaits. The God who made you, He loves you, too. So much so, He gave His life for you.
“Jesus asked, ‘Do you finally believe? But the time is coming—indeed it’s here now—when you will be scattered, each one going his own way, leaving me alone. Yet I am not alone because the Father is with me. I have told you all this so that you may have peace in me. Here on earth you will have many trials and sorrows. But take heart, because I have overcome the world.’” (John 16:31-33, NLT)